Personal Struggles--hard times, advice, progress

FC, my thoughts and prayers are with your Father. I hope he improves soon. You have every right to be scared, he's your father and you love him, it's only natural. ((((hugs))))

FC, yes sometimes it gets down to quality of life vs. quantity. I hope things turn around for your Dad. All you can do is take one day at a time.
(((hugs)))

FC I am sending you and your Dad tons of love.

I'm so sorry, Firecracker. This must be a very sad and anxious time for you.

Thanks for the hugs ladies! Love you all

I feel a little better tonight than I did over the weekend. This afternoon when mom and I went to the hospital we found out they stopped the blood transfusion today and the IV antibiotics, so less tubes in him today. There is still blood in the urine, and he will not be allowed to leave for rehab until that stops, but they started him on some pills that may stop the bleeding. His urologist is suppose to come tomorrow and see what he can do. Today his voice was stronger, he sat up straighter, and was able to stay awake and talk to us for 45 mins. before he asked us to go and let him rest. He is not slurring his words anymore either. His spirits are still really low. He won't watch TV or read any of the booksvisitors have brought him. He is still just picking at his food. I keep thinking he would have more energy and feel better if he would just eat more. For some reason the blood suger keeps going up and down. He's been getting more insulin than ever in his life. Still, I feel there were some positive signs today.

I do not plan to go tomorrow as I have a full day of daycare kids. I am trying to get the business back to normal. I'll call though and I'll go Weds. to see him.

I'm so glad your Dad had a better day. You just have to hold onto that and hope it continues. At his age, these things are not easy to recover from. He must be a fighter, even though he has been depressed.

F/C, I'm glad things are looking a little better for you all.

Well, I just got back from the hospital and running errands with my mom. The hospital visit was very upsetting. There are blockages in the bladder and prostate. He was in pain. He may have to have some sort of proceedure/surgery tomorrow if things don't improve tonight. Plus, his right leg was bloated and retaining water. If that wasn't enough - he has now developed diabetic ulcers on the right foot. I feel like this is never going to freaking end . I just cannot believe it. I am mad, sad, scared and so frustrated because I just don't know what the next day will bring. Clearly my family is being tested.

I'm sorry f/c. Very trying I'm sure. I'm sorry you all are going through this stuff. Hoping it improves very soon. {{f/c and family}}

Sorry FC . so sad for you. I am still sending good thoughts your way.

((((FC))))

I am sitting here waiting for the phone to ring to see if my dad peed on his own! If he pees on his own by 2:00 PM they will send him to rehab today. If not, they will put the catheter back in and he won't be going. He does not even want to think about that. He was in a hell of a state yesterday. In pain from the Thurs. surgery and totally frustrated that he has not progressed.

Yesterday the doc came to check on his right foot and we all are worried. Beside the diabetic ulcer, the toes are not looking very good color wise. The doc is not extremely optimistic about that foot and leg. We have not given up hope about it, just we are preparing ourselves that we may be facing this issue in the future.

So come on dad, PEE already!!

Oh well, I guess I will just keep talking to myself today. Dad didn't pee . They put the catheter back in. He is in a lot of pain and was very disappointed. Didn't want us to come see him at all today. THEN one of his urologists came in. Checked things out. Said he needed to keep the catheter in but he was leaving today for rehab anyway! He doesn't know what time yet. He still doesn't want us to come. He wants us to come to rehab tomorrow when he is settled in his new room. All the rooms at Marian Joy are private, so that is nice. All the rooms are private at our hospital here (which is pretty new) and I didn't know if he would still have his privacy at rehab. I can't wait to see the place. I hear nothing but wonderful things about it. I hope this is the beginning of some more positive days!

FC what a bunch of hard stuff for you and your family.

Major hugs to you.

So FC, is he in rehab? If so, hope the transition went okay and that things are looking up from here.

Yes Austin, my dad arrived at the rehab center about 6:30 PM last night. I talked to him on the phone for only about 15 secs. There was a doc and nurse in the room when I called and he was really tired. He said it was a bumpy ride and that couldn't have been fun with all the discomfort he is in already. He said the room is small. Just a bed and a dresser with a TV on it. We are leaving at noon today to go see him. I hope there is some positive news today. We can't go see him tomorrow during the day as they have him meeting with some doctors at various times. Guess we will just wait and see what that is all about.

According to a nurse my mom talked to at the hospital, my dad insisted on going to rehab. He HAD to get out of that hospital she said. She said he was determined to go! I hope he didn't make a mistake. I assume they wouldn't let him go if he really shouldn't have.

If this is what you Dad wants, then it is good they let him go to rehab. They will base what they do with him based on his stamina and abilities.

He still wants to have a say as to what is happening and is still trying to keep some independence which is a good sign I think.

Yep, dad was adament that he leave and his doc (the one GE calls Doc Jerk) was the one who got him out. Dad wants us to go to his doc's office tomorrow and hug him. He is so happy to be at rehab.

I will start with the good news. MarianJoy lives up to it's great rep. It is gorgeous. The grounds are glorious and the buildings are beautiful. They have places to sit with waterfalls and fireplaces!

Dad's room is about 3 times the size of his hospital room. HUGE bathroom and shower, of course because it needs to have a wheelchair in it. Besides his bed, there is a couch that turns into a bed if my mom wanted to stay the night sometimes. A loveseat and a nice chair. A big chest of drawers with a big TV on it. A huge window with a nice view. I was so very excited about his room and the facilities.

He said the food is great. They let him sleep all night. The hospital kept waking him all night long to check vitals. They already worked him today. Tomorrow he will be evaluated for his goals. He will get 90 mins. therapy in the morning and 90 mins. in the afternoon everyday! At least that is the plan. After the evaluation they will give us a rough estimate as to when we can expect to bring him home.

Bad news, he still has the catheter. We don't know what is going on there yet, and the right leg is in a special protector in an effort to help with the sore on the foot. It goes all the way up to his knee. It looks a little like a fury cast. They take it off for therapy, but other than that his right leg is covered. It is scary to see him with one leg gone and the other in danger. I sure wish I had a crystal ball and knew if that leg would be OK.

Anyway, other than that it seemed to be a pretty good day.

FC, glad you and your family are happy with the rehab facility! Compared to the hospital it is probably like a resort to your Dad!

Hope he continues to do well and can come home soon! Will you be hiring a caregiver for him, or will you be moving your parents into your home soon?

Luca we have no plans like that yet. MarianJoy's goal is to help my dad learn to do things without the left leg and with the posthesis. We will see how he does in that way.

When he gets home my mom will be there to help him with certain needs. So he has her to cook for him and bring him things etc. She would be only to happy to help clean him etc. We just don't know yet if he would need any type of caregiver. His mind is very alert and he is working on upper body strength. If we are fortunate the right leg will hang in there.

Living with us? I don't see that as an option at this time. My MIL is in the apartment attached to the house. She is 85 and we sure can't kick her out. Our part of the house has all bedroom upstairs and you have to go up a long and turning flight of stairs to get to them. Now the attached appartment is all handi-cap equiped since it was built for my FIL who was very handi-capped with parkinsons. It has two bedrooms and two baths but I don't want to ask my MIL to let two people who are not her blood relatives to move in with her. Don't want to put anyone in that position. I don't think my mom would want to live with her anyway "g".

So, we are on a play it by ear right now.

Well, my mom and I went to take my dad some different clothes today. He needed pants with looser legs. We got there at just the right time to go to the gym and watch him get an hour of therapy and a workout. It was interesting and pretty sad. He has a struggle ahead of him. He needs to hop a lot on his right foot and as I told you that foot has a diabetic ulcer and is being treated. Plus he does not have good circulation in the leg. But he worked as hard as he could and I was so glad I got to see what goes on there. It is such an incredible facility. I watched them work with people who had strokes, on oxygen, had accidents. The PTs were all so sweet and caring and knowledgable. I am so impressed with people who choose to take this path. Angels on earth!

Dad got his big heavy cast off today! He is very happy about that. He said it was so heavy. Mom and I got a better idea of how much of the leg is gone and it was surreal watching him bend his knee with just his little stump coming out. What has me really upset is that today a Medic Van took him to his surgeon's office to have the cast removed and his stump checked out. BTW, stump is what all the docs, nurses and PTs call it so I guess that is what I should call it. Anyway, when he was done with his appointment the office called and told the Medic van service that my dad was ready for pick up. He was wheeled into the lobby and left there in his wheelchair for TWO HOURS waiting to be picked up Isn't that horrible??!! Two hours sitting by the door waiting for them to get him. This makes me want to cry He was upset and did tell his case worker when he was returned to rehab. She is going to talk to the service about what happened.

His case worker called me and told me that they are shooting for my dad to leave on May 23rd - just two weeks from today! Next Weds. my mom and I are going there for a 3 hour training course in how to help him once he gets home. If my mom does really good with the training they will bring him to my folks on the 23rd. If mom appears unable to help him properly than they will send him to a less intense rehab out our way (this one takes us an hour to get to) for a couple of weeks until his upper body strength is better. I told mom she better to really good at the training because I know my dad is so anxious to get home! It's been 3 weeks today since I took him to the ER.

We still don't know about his prostate issues. I guess I'll worry about that later!

Good morning ladies.

I just got a call that my dad is being taken to the hospital by ambulance. I will be leaving in a few mins. to pick up my mom (they won't let her go in the ambulance with him) and we will go to the hospital. Could you all say a little prayer or whatever for us today?

Thanks and I love you all

Hugs and best thoughts of goodness to you and you family, FC.

Prayers and good thoughts going out to you and your family, firecracker.

FC, I wasn't able to read everything, but got the gist that your dad is in really bad shape. I understand his need to get out of the hospital. That place just brings your morale down and is detrimental to your health as far as I'm concerned.

My mom gets carted around by Access Services. They don't seem to understand that these people are handicapped and my mom has been left sitting there in the dark for 2-3 hours. They'll insist they came there and she wasn't there when she was sitting outside the whole time!

Anyway, I'm sorry about your dad. I hope everything turns out OK. I know it's rough. It's good you have family around to support you.