Personal Struggles--hard times, advice, progress

Prayers and good thoughts going out to you and your family, firecracker.

Thanks ladies!

What a looooong day! 12 hours in the ER! NO FUN!!

My dad has to take a TON of pills a day. Somehow several of them were not going all the way down and all got stuck at the bottom of his esophagus preventing him from swallowing and causing some breathing problems. After being there from 8:30 to 5:00 PM they came in and told us they were going to perform a little surgery to clean it all out and open up his esophagus . They said if it went well he could go home tonight. So at 8:30 we got to bring him home. What an ordeal getting him in the car. No men to help us. Just two nurses mom and me. None of us really strong enough to lift him up out of the wheelchair and the great big security guard was not ALLOWED to touch him due to "policy". Thank you lawyers and law suits!! So he just stood there and watch us struggle to get him in the car. Sadly, the only way he could get in was to put down his right foot which is a big no no. The poor man has soooo many health issues it seems like it will just never stop.

Anyway, at least we got thru this new issue and he is back home. But every time he gets home - a few days later he is back in the hospital for something else. Now every time our phone rings I yell out "Jesus Christ what now" . I never though I would be happy to see "political call" on my caller I.D.

FC......I'm sorry about your Dad. It is never easy seeing our parents needing help or in ill health. I hope he feels better and doesn't have to go back to the hospital anytime soon. I will keep him in my thoughts and prayers.

FC, it is such a relief to know that your Dad did not have to be admitted to the hospital again this time and could return home.

Too bad your hubby or one of your son's was'nt with you to help get him back in the car.

Hope you have a much better day tomorrow!

We all thought the big security guy would help us until he said his boss told him he wasn't allowed. At that point there wasn't anything else to do. My father was wheeled up to the car door at the main entrance. It was pouring rain and it would have taken about 30 mins. for them to get to the hospital. Poor dad just wanted to get home. When I got home I told hubby and the boys that next time I would have to call them to come and help. The problem is hubby has been working late a lot the last few weeks with people on vacation and now Eric will be working 4:00 to 11:00 on several evenings a week so we won't always to able to count on them. If it had been earlier then the hospital would have called this transport company that just puts him in their big van in his wheelchair and brings him home like the last two times, but it was too late in the evening.

Well, things just didn't work out for my dad

His right foot got infected again. We took him to the ER last night. After tests, and the surgeon who amputated the left leg went over everything this evening, they have decided that the right leg has to be amputated also. We need to meet with the surgeon tomorrow at noon for a family consultation. We are not sure yet when the surgery will be. The doc told my dad that he would probably not be getting any prosthetic legs. I feel so bad for him. He is so depressed. My mom is crying her eyes out. I will have to be the strong one. I have no siblings. I don't really know if they will be able to stay in their townhouse. What a sad situation.

If you all could send some prayers or good vibes our way I would sure appreciate it.

Sending out good thoughts and prayers to you and your parents, firecracker.

Thanks Badger I've been calling friends and relatives. It helps to talk to people. They have been so comforting.

I am so sorry to hear this news. It has to be so very difficult, not only for your Father to handle but your Mother and You as well. Many thoughts and prayers going your way. (((((HUG)))))

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs to firecracker}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Thanks ladies! It means a lot I hope his body is strong enough to go thru all this again and I hope that the right stump heels as well as the left one did.

FC I am sending you tons of love. Please give your Dad a big hug from me.

Thanks Aerwin! We appreciate all the hugs we can get!

fc, sending you a big {{{{hug}}}} and my thoughts and prayers.

FC, I wouldn't wish this on anyone. I'm sure you have a strong support system there to get you through this.

Well, it was a long day at the hospital and I didn't get home until 10:30 PM. My dad pulled thru. This surgery was a little more complicated and he had to be put completely under this time. The procedure took a little longer and they kept him in recover longer this time also. They took him down at 5:00 to the OR and we didn't see him again until 9:45. Much longer than the first amputation. He was awake when we left and seemed pretty alert. He was in a lot of pain so they were giving him morphine. He said it was much worse then the last time, pain wise.

If all goes well and no complications like there were last time, he should leave for rehab in about 3 days or so. The surgeon said that they ARE going to go ahead and get him prosthetic legs and that they are going to start on one for the left side, that is all healed, very soon. While he is in rehab. The doc wants him to get used to using the left prosthesis while the right stump is healing. Then it will be easier to work them both once he has gotten used to one. The doc says it will not be easy. He will need lots of PT and he will need to be determined and keep at it. We need to keep encouraging him when he gets discouraged. The doc believes my dad can do it. I hope he is right.

My dad is just so relieved that the surgery is over. Talking with him today before the surgery he told me he was so worried he wouldn't make it thru the surgery because of his age and bad heart. He had me pretty scared there for awhile!

We told the surgeon how depressed he has been and he is going to have a psychologist talk to him a few times while he is in the hospital and then again in rehab.

Well, I need to get into bed now. Kiddies coming early tomorrow!
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Sending more prayers and good thoughts out to you and your parents, firecracker.

Sending all my prayers, thoughts and hugs for you FC and your family. (((((HUGS))))))

What an ordeal for you dad and you and your mom. Hugs all around.

Sending good thoughts to you FC. Glad he made it through and now they're talking about getting the legs. So things are better than they were right before the surgery. ((FC))

Austin, IMO yes they are better because now he can move forward. Treating the wound has been going on for 3 mos. and holding him back from getting the left prosthesis. I'm sure emotionally for him it does not seem better - looking down and seeing NO legs has to be worse than looking down and seeing one leg. Under the circumstances though, it was for the best.

Thanks again ladies for your good wishes, thoughts and prayers Now we will keep praying that he is strong enough to learn to work the two legs.

Well, I have had very little sleep. Still so upset about what happened yesterday

After being at the hospital to be with my father Mon. thru Thurs., yesterday I was taking a break from picking up mom and going. My MIL picked up my mom and they went to the hospital to see my dad. I knew they were getting there about 2:00 PM. Well, 2:30 PM my phone rings and it is my MIL saying "Deb, you better get to the hospital! Something is very wrong!" Hubby was home so he said "I will go with you". We get there and my MIL is in the hallway. Hubby and I go into my dad's room and it is filled with nurses - 5 of them - and my dad's doctor frantic on the phone. My dad has no color and is completely out of it. Soaking wet with sweat. My mom is crying. I began to shake. The nurses had no clue what was wrong. The kept saying his vitals were fine. Dad's doc say "We are taking him to intensive care now!" The nurses say "shouldn't we wait?". Dad's doc says "Now!" Since the nurses tell dad doc's his blood sugar was not low, dad's doc is worried about heart issues. You have to remember at this point my dad has been like this for about an hour.

So we all hurry down to Intensive Care. They tell us to wait in "the family room". Mom doesn't want to leave dad. I make her come with us. We are in the room a few mins. when 3 doctors come in - dad's doc, heart doctor, and another I don't know, and they ask us "If he crashes what do you want us to do? Life support or no?" If we put him on a breathing tube how long do you want us to give him? Heart doctor says "He has been through so much the past 5 months, maybe it's best to let him go and not use the breathing machine Dad's doc and I say "Give him a chance and at least use it a few days". My mom is a mess. MIL is upset. I am in disbelief. Just an hour before my mom and MIL got there my dad was sitting up eating and talking with his friend Frank who came to see him. Frank told us he couldn't believe how well my dad was doing considering two days prior he had a second amputation.

So, heart doc is telling us he could have had a heart attack, congestive heart failure or staph infection in the blood. They are running tests. Hard to tell about heart attack due to pacemaker. So we sit not knowing what is facing us.

So, let me go back to when my mom and MIL were visiting in dad's room. Shortly after they got there my father went from sort of good to really bad. Very weak and out of it. My mom feared low blood sugar. She has seen it several times before. She gets the nurse to check on him. Nurse takes blood sugar and machine reads 270. She tells mom it's been high all day. Mom says - I don't think so. This is how he gets when it is low. Nurse doesn't check again or even look at symptoms. Says it's 270 and he is just tired. Mom and MIL keep their eye on things. Mom finds that dad's gown is soaking wet. She goes for nurse. Nurse changes gown. Does nothing else. In mins. the second gown is soaked. Mom gets nurse. She says "I'm telling you his blood sugar is too low!" Nurse says "No it's not!" Changes him again and leaves. Now dad starts coughing and shallow breathing with raspy sounds. Mom's gets nurse and says "You get a doctor in here NOW" So then there are 5 nurses - still no doc. All nurses say is "I think he is just really tired" Mom "GET A DOCTOR NOW". Family doc happens to be in hospital for meeting. He gets into the room. He sees the report of 270 blood sugar and all other vitals and that is when we all get to Intensive Care.

So back to that part of the story. Family doc comes in and tells us "He is doing much better. Sitting up and talking" When they checked his blood sugar in the Intensive Care with a different machine it was 35!!! 35!!

Family doc says he believes that is the only problem. No signs of heart attack and they don't think anything else. Family doc is PISSED! Pissed that the machine in his room malfunctioned and really pissed about the nurses. He was on the phone and chewing people out.

We get into the room and dad is sitting up talking and joking. At this point they still think that is all it was.

So here is where my head is. The nurses only went by the machine and not on any symptoms. Dismissed my mother and MIL's (MIL is also diabetic and knows things) pleading that it is low blood sugar and something should be done. Told my mom several times he is just tired and let him rest. I firmly believe if my mom and MIL had not been there at that time my father would be dead or in a diabetic coma. As it was his lungs filled with fluid and that was the cause of shallow breathing and raspy sounds.

Now, my FIL died in the Intensive Care Unit at this hospital 4 years ago. The bill for Intensive Care was astronomical!! My folks are only with medicare - which only goes $300,000 and they are done with you. My dad already has had 5 mos. of hospital stays and rehab and home care etc. This would put him over and probably no hope for his legs.

I feel that if the machine had not malfunctioned and the nurses had paid attention to the symptoms and got a different blood sugar machine to check it again he never would have needed to go to Intensive Care. I am livid about this. I am beyond pissed that the nurses said "let him sleep" and that a doctor was only called in after my mom pitched a fit that the nurses didn't believe her about the blood sugar being too low.

So, we are going to the hospital later not just to see him but to talk to someone about what happened. Don't get me wrong, we are thrilled he is better, but we were all put thru hell because of this. My dad was alert enough to hear the docs and thought he was a goner (his words) and we were basically told there wasn't much hope. Plus the heart doc telling us we should "let him go" because he had been thru enough. All of this could have been avoided if the nurses would have listened to my mom and MIL.

It is Sat. and I don't know if admins. are in, or for sure who to talk to, but I am talking to somebody today!! This was all just wrong!

I do want to say this, my parents family doctor (who also happens to be my hubby and sons doc) was amazing thru the whole thing! Caring, supportive, forceful about what he wanted done and who he wanted working on my dad, stayed with us the entire time. I can see why this doctor is so loved by my folks and the community. There are write ups in the paper about him all the time. I swear I fell in love with him yesterday!

So wish me luck today! I guess there are three things I want to accomplish -getting across the point that I felt the nurses were neglectful -I want something done about that blood check machine and nurses going by symptoms also, and I want to see what I can have done about the billing for Intensive Care. That is a huge issue here. I would hate for my parents to lose there home over this, or my dad not be able to get his legs, because medicare is all used up after this.

I did find out there is a service that goes over huge hospital bills and they have saved patients thousands of dollars. If I don't get satisfaction on my own, I will hire a consultant.

Oh, Firecracker. I'm so sorry.

Update!

Just talked to my dad and his doctor via phone. Nothing wrong but the low blood sugar! Dad and doc hopping mad about what happened. My dad wants action taken. He knows the nurses almost caused him to buy the farm (his words)

His doc is working to get him out of the intensive care unit now. My father was suppose to leave for the rehab center tomorrow BUT because of this he cannot leave for 3 more days! Rehab rules. I understand the rehab rule perfectly, but sadly my dad should not have needed to go to intensive care in the first place.

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I guess there are three things I want to accomplish -getting across the point that I felt the nurses were neglectful -I want something done about that blood check machine and nurses going by symptoms also, and I want to see what I can have done about the billing for Intensive Care. That is a huge issue here. I would hate for my parents to lose there home over this, or my dad not be able to get his legs, because medicare is all used up after this.

I did find out there is a service that goes over huge hospital bills and they have saved patients thousands of dollars. If I don't get satisfaction on my own, I will hire a consultant.

Wow, First, I am so glad your Mother spoke up and advocated to get a Doctor! She rocks! Secondly, that "nurse" should be fired. Whether she was an RN or an LPN would be interesting to find out. Clearly this person is unqualified to work with patients whatever her qualifications are.

There needs to be a quality assurance investigation of what happenned and I am sure your family MD is making sure of that. But, I completely agree that no way in hell should your Dad have to pay for his time in intensive care or the addition 2-3 days he will need to stay in the hospital because of their negligence.

You go girl!!!! I wish you all the luck in the world, and may the force be with you!